Managing Expectations – Both for yourself and for you partners

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Well, if there’s one thing I came to realize during my vacation is that I have a strong tendency toward unrealistic expectations.  And I tend to have this problem for both myself and everyone around me.  In general, it can be very toxic.  Let me explain a little more about my “issue” and I hope you can treat this as a cautionary tale.

For those of you that know me personally, you know that I might be a “tad” on the driven side.  I work my ass off night after night for my dream of being able to focus solely on my software business.  I love doing it and I also want the ability to work almost exclusively from home so I can see my kids grow up and not be stuck on the road.  So, this drives me relentlessly, so that I work from the time the kids go to daycare until they come home.  Then as soon as they go to bed until I can no longer think straight, then I repeat this process, day after day.  Now, I’m realizing this might be borderline obsessive behavior.  Now it’s healthier than booze or gambling…  but potentially a problem.  However, the real problem I’ve discovered inside of myself is that I expect others to have this attitude.  It applies to both my personal and my professional life.

I often expect too much of my wife.  I expect her to have the same “motivation” as me, and when she doesn’t, or more to the point, doesn’t live up to my ideals, I get frustrated and withdrawn, and end up working even harder.  This isn’t fair to anyone.  I build up these expectations in my head, and it causes trouble in my life.  Now I’m noticing that I’m doing the same thing in my business life.  The really stupid part is that instead of talking about the issue, I just bury it and expect people to get better magically.

I guess realization is the first step to fixing the solutions…  step two is learning to express myself better in the first place.  So, learn from my mistakes…  keep your expectations realistic (for yourself and everyone in your life) and communicate those expectations.  Good luck



As always, thanks for reading and don't forget to check out our SAP Service Management Products at my other company JaveLLin Solutions,

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